Strictly Personal

There will be an hour of my films screened at this year’s All American Film Festival. My program will be part of a local filmmakers block that starts at 3pm on Saturday, March 8th at the Marvell Center, Durham. Dear Stranger, Indian Giver and (crowd favorite) Banana Bus will be among the films I will be screening. Of course, I will be there to answer questions and chit chat afterwards.

The All American Film Festival is a four day event that features some of the best local and national films including Slamdance Grand Jury Winner Abel Raises Cain. There will also be tons of local music. I expect to be jumping from one location to another to keep up with it all, should be a lot of fun. Hope to see you there.

Update: Banana Bus wins Best North Carolina Film Award at the All American Film Festival. Woohoo! It was a fantastic festival, the audience were so smart and friendly, the films were incredible and the filmmakers who attended were a pleasure to meet. Can’t get better than that!

• We have moved to Durham and we feel silly for being so paranoid (knock on wood). We have eaten out so much, the restaurants around us are wonderful.
• We also got cable, I want to see the shows that the company I work produce. Cable kills boredom, not good for my creativity. Just like my earlier addiction to the internet, I look forward to the burnout.
• Talking about work, I am crazy busy. I feel nuts for spending time writing this.
• I want this person to be the next president of the United States.
• I await Tennis weather. We do have a gym nearby which I think I might put to use.
• The All American Film Festival is presenting an hour of my work, more details when they arrive.
• Don’t feel like a filmmaker anymore because I AM NOT MAKING ANYTHING.
• I hate Verizon, when we moved, they were the only ones that provided DSL in our area. So we get it, install their new software and for no fucking reason, their software deletes my bookmarks. Common problem that they refuse to address. So bye bye you lousy bastards.
• This is probably the best news: I have friends now that feel like family.

What a year! A turnaround in many ways. I was sinking for the past couple of years with little glimpses of flying. At the end of the year, I was tired but also quietly elated. I see several paths to where I want to be.

To celebrate the recent holidays, I’ve made a video which I can’t resist from watching every so often.

K-I-S-S-I-N-G.

Article about my love for the Mac and my start in filmmaking.

I love quiet music, a child of classical music, a sister of film music, a distant cousin of elevator music. I am not into loud “listen to me” music. The only thing they get me to do is shake my booty which I find myself rarely doing. But when driving or in need for some nourishment, I turn to my quiet music.

With quiet music, I mean Philip Glass, not Mozart (who I also love) which is classical. I like something that is taking a risk with form but is trying to keep the other elements of music intact like harmony and melody.

When I listen to this kind of music, I seem to become a storyteller telling stories I never knew existed. Not fantasies like Lord of the Rings but stories about people I have never met, and for whatever reason I suddenly seem to understand. I get them, I know they fit in the scheme of things. I understand them better than they understand themselves.

I especially love when quiet music has an element of suspense. It could be the most boring drive but when a quiet suspenseful song on my mix cd starts to unravel, the hairs on my arms stand up. A physical sensationthat makes me revel in the mystery of myself, my body. Unlike say dancing where I am aware of what causes the sensation and what is to be had.

There is not a bigger supply of creativity for me than this kind of music: quiet, unassuming, giving.

So few can be called “a patron of the arts”. People will spend an eternity deciding to spend money on a book, cd, movie and such. But the same amount for food, gas, clothes and general crap is not an issue. And I am not talking about people who have no money to spend. Giving money to an artist or buying something from them meets a complicated approval process.

• Is this artist worthy of encouragement?
• I don’t really need it. I can cut this out of my budget.
• It can’t be any good if I am dealing directly with the artist?
• I don’t really need it. I can donate the money to a cause and get a tax break.
• They are living the dream life, I must make them struggle.
• I don’t really need it. I can get a cheap or free version of it.
• It might challenge me, or my life or the people and things that I like. Why should I pay for that?

If people get past their issues with art, then they have to deal with the stereotypes that artists themselves love to paint:

• Artists should not be interested in money.
• Best art comes from poverty.
• They also die in poverty.
• Best art makes no money.
• The best work of an artist always fails to make its money back.
• Best art comes from a great struggle.
• Art should never simply be easy or fulfilling.

I often find myself being cheap with my favorite musicians, filmmakers, writers and so on. It needs to end.

Music is “The Secret.” Yes, it is that simple. Less thinking about thinking. More listening.

Listening, a.k.a. thinking outwards, entails an interest outside of yourself. You want rewards, sure there is plenty. Curiosity and compassion. You can’t help yourself any better. Well actually you can but that requires taste and taste is handed out unevenly.

Trust me, there is no easter egg to find in your brain. Stop searching.

I have been so tired of working as a freelancer for so long. It seems that I have spent too much time and energy in finding work. My work had no resemblance of structure and I was generally stressed out. However, my patience has been rewarded. On Wednesday, Oct 17th, I start on a full-time position with a company that couldn’t have better fitted my ideal work environment. Small to medium sized company that produces a lot of content. Very edgy content. It is going to be an education. Woohoo!

My wonderful Macintosh G5 finally became a villain when the main hard drive died on me. The SMART system provided no warning whatsoever. And I was hours away from making backups. I swear. So currently, Data Rescue, a disk recovery program, has been working for more than a week on my computer. It has a couple of more days left, it seems. Fingers crossed. I made a lot of writing notes, I hope that isn’t lost.

CovergeSouth is showing a bunch of my films. Ava Gardner Film Festival had a SquiggleBooth retrospective and screened Dear Stranger.